Memorial Day... Lest We Forget what it's REALLY all about.

This may be the one and only post you ever see from me that probably won't offend anyone!  Believe it or not.

Contrary to some beliefs, Memorial Day is not all about picnics and beer... but it IS about those brave souls who gave their ALL for freedom. Yes, the Freedom to be able to have picnics and beer. So many of our brave soldiers have given their lives so we could enjoy what so many of us sadly take for granted. 

It is immensely important that we take a moment sometime this weekend and say a prayer for all those who gave their all. And to pray for those who gave their lives and have no one to remember them, and those who rest in foreign soil in many far corners of the world. 

I personally know several veterans of various wars. My mom's friend, Lou LaGioia, is a veteran of Iwo Jima and was very physically close to the flag raising. He is a hero but insists that the heroes are those who died there. He was on the burial detail and was one who saw the torture inflicted on very young men. They were teenagers and men in their 20s... hero children themselves.  Imagine that for a minute - some of you have teenage kids.  Imagine YOUR 19 year old seeing burned, tortured and mutilated fellow servicemen who had been their buddies, comrades, friends.   

Another friend is a Vietnam veteran who took a very long time to even talk about his war experiences because he was so emotionally wounded. When he finally opened up there was no stopping him and I have listened to him for many, many hours. He won the Bronze Star and Purple Heart.  He is a hero, too but insists that the heroes are those who didn't make it back. 

Yet another, our (great great) nephew, Tony Polichetti, serves now as we speak, in a foreign land and far away from those he loves. I pray every day for his safe return to his loving family. Thankfully he will be home in not too long a time. And there is also another (great) nephew, Matthew Polichetti, who recently joined the Marines.  There is another friend and co-worker of mine in the Air Force who served a few tours in Iraq and Afghanistan.  

Bravery is a weird thing and has many interpretations... but there is no greater love a man has than to lay down his life, or be willing to lay down his life for his country and to protect the freedom which costs so much. Just for instance... 

As Gunny Hiway said in "Heartbreak Ridge" (one of my favorite movies),  "Jumping out of a perfectly good aircraft is not a natural act"...  and I think that people who do this are crazy bordering on insane. But that does NOT MEAN that I don't absolutely know that every man who was a paratrooper in WWII was a stone cold HERO. It only means I couldn't do it. 

But then again, most people didn't want to transport prisoners and sit behind a desk for Uncle Sam for 37 years. But I did it. Veterans, especially those who gave their ALL, public servants, whether paratroopers, US Marshals, local police, firefighters and first responders... take a minute this weekend while you celebrate, and say a little prayer. For them, for us. Thank God for giving us those who gave their all, and thank the soldiers and veterans you see today. It means more than you think.  I can't tell you how many times a young Marine has stopped the aforementioned Lou LaGioia, shook his hand and thanked him for his service.  It takes so little effort to make someone's day.

Shake their hands, give them a smile, say Thank You, and if you're in a restaurant and can do it, PICK UP THE CHECK. Get your sorry butts to Arlington National Cemetery and see the Changing of the Guard. Go to DC on a Tuesday night to the Iwo Jima Memorial and see the U.S. Marine Drum and Bugle Corps and the Silent Drill team. Its all good. 

Thanks for listening. Thanks, veterans. God bless you all. You ARE loved. 

Another Rant... Are you in THAT MUCH of a hurry?

As many of you know, I am a practicing Catholic.  Lou is, also.  This past Saturday, he went to the 4:00 PM Mass at St. John Bosco, our parish.  I went on Sunday morning to the Carmelite Monastery in Philadelphia.  Our rant is thus:  And here's the warning, if you're easily offended, STOP reading now.  If you read on, and it applies to you, and you're offended, GOOD.

Lou, as I stated, went to the Saturday Mass at 4 pm which is heavily attended at St. John Bosco.  I mean HEAVILY attended.  I will assume most people are going because of their obligation, or because they want to, or whatever.  Here's the point...

The good God gave us life, blessings.  We have enough to eat, a roof over our heads, and are clothed.  Most of us have good families and wonderful friends, and people we love, who love us in return.

What God has for us is LIMITLESS, unconditional and absolute love.  Think of how your dog loves you, but make that love boundless and eternal. You could leave the dog after scolding it, and then come back five minutes later, and guess what, that dog still loves you.  You can leave God after sinning, and then come back after thirty years (as we did) and guess what, that God still loves you.  Maybe that's why GOD spelled backward is DOG.

Think of how you feel if you see someone you love that you haven't seen in a long time.  You hug, kiss, smile, laugh, and are joyful and happy.  When we walk into God's house, I like to think He is happy to "see" us.  I like to think that if I make a visit to the Adoration Chapel, it's like a surprise visit to someone who really REALLY wants to see me.  It's my way of "befriending" God and keeping a close relationship with Him.

Here goes...  WHY must people go to Mass, go to Holy Communion, which is reception of God Himself, and head STRAIGHT for the door to get out as if someone were chasing them?  What, you can't stay for the last FIVE minutes to receive the blessing?  Are you in THAT much of a hurry to just get out of the parking lot?  If a missed friend came to see you and made you happy, and you give of yourself to them, why would you be happy to see them RUN full speed out of your house?

Well, I think for a person to go running out of the church with Communion still in their mouths is not only disrespectful to the Sacrament, but it is, in my opinion, downright sacrilege.  What, are you SO damn much in a hurry to beat traffic out of the church lot that five more minutes are going to really matter?  And to leave without the blessing?  Seriously, are you SO important that you can't give God five more minutes?  After all He has given you?  Really?  He gives unconditional love, and you can't give (not even) an hour?  Wow, you must really think you're important.

My childhood pastor at St. Barnabas Church, Father Joseph LaRue, would STOP on the altar and call you OUT.  "Hey Mister, WHERE do you think you're going?  SIT DOWN."  Sometimes I think it's a shame that the fire codes prohibit locking the doors.

Think about what you're doing the next time you think that five minutes is going to REALLY matter.  What are you rushing back to?  Work?  House full of noise?  House full of chaos?  Housework?  You can't WAIT to get back to that, huh?  You afraid you're going to miss Early Bird at Warminster West or the Red Lion?  Suck it up, cupcake.

By the way, at the Carmelite Monastery, NO ONE leaves till after the recessional hymn.

OK, rant over.  (for now).

Entitlements? I don't think so... Warning: This is all about ME. :)

As always I will start this rant by saying... if you get offended easily, STOP READING NOW.

I worked for the U.S. Marshals Service for 37 years.  I worked HARD.  There were not many days I wasn't busy from the morning till I left.  I loved my job (up until the last year and a half).  It identified who I was for a very long time.  I was extremely proud of my job, and did it exceedingly well.  I had enough of a reputation to be called upon, several times over several years, to set up administrative controls for fugitive operations, called into Headquarters to teach, called to Glynco to teach.  I was a formative member of a Fugitive Task Force that still exists even to this day, having started in 1983.  Did a lot of traveling to nice places, and lots more to NOT so nice places.

So enough about the job....   here goes.

Jump forward to today - someone posted one of those facebook posts of "wisdom" that said, and I quote:

"ENTITLEMENTS?  I paid cash for my Social Security insurance.  Our benefits are NOT some kind of charity or handout!  Congressional benefits... premium federal healthcare, outrageous retirement packages, 67 paid holidays, three weeks paid vacation, unlimited paid sick days!  Now THAT'S welfare.  And they have the nerve to call my retirement an entitlement??"   Repost  yada yada

Well, guess what.  I don't like that this post makes it sound like ALL federal employees get 'entitlement' instead of 'retirement'.  This pisses me off no end.  I worked for THIRTY SEVEN years for my retirement.  Nobody GAVE it to me, I EARNED it, every fu**ing dollar of it.  FOR YOU.  I was a PUBLIC SERVANT.  I worked FOR YOU.  And don't give me that "MY taxes paid YOUR salary" shit, either.  That was always good to piss me off too.  I AM A TAXPAYER TOO,  you simple ass.

I don't get Social Security, and I'm glad.  I paid for my retirement, it's NOT charity.  I PAY for my 'premium healthcare'.  NOBODY gives it to me.  I do NOT have an 'outrageous' retirement package.  I do ok for giving Uncle Sam 37 years of my life.  I did NOT get 67 paid holidays or 'unlimited paid sick days'.  I did get 26 days vacation a year, WHICH I EARNED.  So get it out of your mind now, if that's what you think about what a federal employee gets.  (by the way, they pay into Social Security now just like everybody else).

These congressional ASSHATS make all the money, get all the perks, get all the paid holidays, unlimited sick leave, free travel, armed protection, and they get painfully little done.  If I were half as inefficient at my job as these effin' LOSERS are, I would have lost my job way before 37 years.  And they would have done it, as hard as it is to fire a federal employee.

Now that I've retired (as of July 3, 2008)...  I reserve the right to get up when I want, do what I want WHEN I want (OR NOT).  I can go to church, the library, shopping.  If I wanted to I could get a part time job, or volunteer.  I give blood, have time to go to lunch with my mother, or go to movies with a friend.  I sit at my computer, and read and WRITE, which I love to do.  I always wanted the time to write, and now I have it.  I read papers, blogs, and look at Youtube and whatever else I find interesting.  I cruise eBay.  I like Etsy.  I browse Pinterest and Facebook.  Not a day goes by I don't learn something new.

There may be some (I'm sure there are) who think I'm lazy because I always smile when I say "NOTHING" when people ask what I do now. If I wanted a job, I'd have one.  I looked forward to the ability to do NOTHING for a very long time, so if you think I need to go out and get a job, or do something, or whatever, guess what.  You can eat shit and bark at the moon.  

If you can retire at 55 and do "nothing"... translation:  whatever you want... more power to you.  I did.  I'm very happy, and that's what matters. I guess if you want to call THAT an 'entitlement'...  go right ahead.  Just know I EARNED IT.

If you're offended, tough.  Build a bridge and GET OVER IT.

"Music" at Masses: Songs, not Hymns.

This post is purely my unbridled, uncensored opinion about the so-called 'music' at St. John Bosco church in Hatboro.  I am critical, opinionated and brutally honest. Translation:  If you are easily offended... stop reading NOW.

I am a church going Catholic.  I love my faith, even though I was away for awhile.  I was in the choir at St. John's when they had a REAL trained choir director, Mrs. Winifred Bell.  She was a gifted, wonderful, patient woman, and a good friend.  When she retired, we floundered awhile until we were lucky to snag Dr. Lucy Carroll, another gifted, trained conductor and a wonderful musician.  She taught us much about singing and music.  Then... the pastor at the time, who was a creep, fired her, and we walked.  We went to the Carmelite Monastery in Philadelphia to sing.

We remained at the Monastery for ten years, till a few years ago.  Their choir still does a wonderful job.  And I continue to love the music, the sacred, beautiful HYMNS and motets, polyphony, and chant.  I learned to completely despise the garbage they call music now at masses.  If that's what you like, oh well ok, but it's definitely not me, I don't think it is respectful or sacred.  I still go to the Monastery when I need to hear good, lovely and well executed hymns and music.

Back to St. John Bosco...  a couple of years ago they made their 7am Mass music-less.  Which, considering I can't stand the more 'modern' music, was a welcome thing to me.  I would much rather have silence than the awful din and unsingable excuses for music they pick, and 'sing'.  I have, many times, complained to the parish powers about their music choices.  They insist on throwing songs (not hymns) out there which sound like circus music and BAD 70s disco.  Now they removed their 'recommendations' section from their facebook page, but that certainly will NOT keep me from letting them know how I feel.   Now that it's Easter Season, we devotees of the 7am Mass must put up with their awful music.  Nothing worse than bad music done badly.

If their 'music director' is a trained conductor, I am a monkey's uncle.  She is at best, a lounge singer and at worse, a 'performer' when she should be leading the congregation, not performing.  Now let me say I know many singers, one in particular, who has a beautiful voice.  I have heard her sing everything from oldies to the National Anthem.  She does both well and appropriately.  If she were a cantor at a church, I'm pretty sure she wouldn't use the same singing style as she does in either of her other venues.  If she were meant to LEAD the congregation, I doubt she would make it all about HER.

But this 'music director' makes it all about her when she is supposed to be leading.  And she is over dramatic in her moves and vibrato.  She sings an octave higher than is comfortable for any alto (like myself) or any male voice.  Most times, NO ONE is singing with her because she's out of everyone's range.  Not to mention that the 'music' is so UNsacred and irreverent, und un-melodic.

I see no reason why, if you MUST have 'music' at the 7am Mass, you can't offer more traditional HYMNS as opposed to songs, and God forbid you should sing anything in the beautiful universal language of the Church, which is LATIN.  Not everything, just a hymn here and there.  Maybe to keep your older folks happy?  You think they want to hear the SCHLOCK you are belting out from the pulpit like some cheap lounge lizard?  I think not.  They probably would actually SING ALONG with some traditional hymns.

It's pretty bad when the chimes from the bell tower at St. John's plays better music than what is heard on the inside.  Really.

Get with it, Ms. "music director".  Give us a break.  Pick some traditional, sacred music, and preserve the respect and mystery that the Mass is supposed to be, and leave the Oregon Press schlock, tripe and crap alone for once.  You may be surprised to actually hear people joining in the singing, or even want to actually (gulp) join your choir.

And there you have it.  If you are grossly offended, too damn bad.  I warned you.

That 'equal' sign...

Mini rant for the day:  Before you read further, remember the name of this blog:  NOT SUGAR COATED.  If you are easily offended, STOP READING NOW.  Be warned.

I'm noticing that lots of people are making that red 'equal' sign their profile picture... in favor of equal rights for ... whoever.  Blah blah blahhhhhhhh.  Here's how I feel.

If you are gay... fine.  I really don't care.  If you are straight, I really don't care.
If you want to marry... fine.  I really don't care.  If you don't, I still don't care.
If you want to marry your pet goat... fine.  I really don't care.  If you don't, I really don't care.
If you want to be happy with whoever... fine.  I really don't care.  If you want to be miserable, I don't care.
If you like broccoli... fine, eat it till you drop.  I really don't care.  If you don't... I don't care.
If you think marriage should be between a MAN and a WOMAN, fine.  I really don't care.  If you think otherwise, that's your right, too.  And I will not judge you, it's not my job.

If you think I'm going to change my profile picture to an equal sign, I'm not, and that doesn't necessarily mean I agree or disagree with what it stands for.  It's because I think it's not an attractive picture.  You have a right to your equal sign and I have a right to a picture of my brothers and myself.

If you want to interpret the Bible and say gays are going to hell, you're perfectly free to do that, but YOU aren't the ultimate Judge.  That's not our job.   It's not our job to say ANYONE goes to hell, including Hitler.  Who are YOU to say where he is???

If I used birth control and you think I'm going to hell, well, you don't know me, and still don't have the right to judge me any more than I have a right to judge you.

I don't believe that politicians should be involved if you want to marry your girlfriend, boyfriend, or your pet goat.  They should have a whole lot of more important shit to worry about.

If you are kissing in public and are straight... I don't want to see it.  YUCK.
If you are kissing in public and you're gay.....I don't want to see it.  YUCK.
If you treat me badly and you're straight, I will not respect you.  If you treat me badly and you're gay, I will not respect you.
If you mistreat or hurt someone I love and you're straight, you might as well be dead.  If you mistreat or hurt someone I love and you're gay, you might as well be dead.

Noticing a trend here?  You're already all equal in my book.

If you love this blog... fine.  I really don't care.  If you hate it, I still don't care.  Find a cereal box or something.

"Habemus Papam!" (We have a Pope!)

This conclave was far shorter than I would have expected... I would have said definitely by the end of this week we would have a Pope.  But at the fifth or sixth vote?  Wow.

The newly elected Pope Francis seems to be a peaceful, humble man.  (Most Jesuits I know are neither!)  I admire his choice of name, and totally loved his asking for a moment of silence in prayer for him.  And you could hear a pin drop in St. Peter's Square.   I would have given ANYTHING to be there.  It would have been a million times better than being in Times Square on New Years Eve.

It is said that he was close in running when Pope Emeritus Benedict was elected, and that he, in second place, pleaded with his brother cardinals to NOT elect him.  Now knowing that, I'm sure that had something to do with the speed of his selection.  I hope God blesses him, and inspires him to be the right mix of traditionalist AND reformer.  God knows we need some help in moving the Roman Church forward and shaking it free of the chains of scandal which bind it.  It is said that St. Francis himself ventured to Rome and told the then-Pope that this church needed reformation.  Hopefully, his taking the name Francis will kind of point toward that end.

I loved his speaking Italian so beautifully, albeit with a slight Spanish accent.  And I understood every word he said, and wished that the woman translating for Fox News would just shut up, because I didn't need her interpretation and 'umms' and 'ahhhs'.  Geez, some people get PAID for speaking, you'd think they'd find someone who didn't stammer every other word.  But I digress!

Anyway, I guess the point of this little 'rant' is that maybe now the never ending media coverage will END, and that the haters will leave my Church alone.  Haters can't bash Catholics any better, and maybe they're having fun because they can't have this kind of published hate toward Muslims or other groups.  Maybe they can now go back to worrying about reality shows and how many times the KarTrashians marry and reproduce.  Let this seemingly humble man take the reins and guide the Church onto a better path, and Fox can go back to worrying about the Obam-ination and his bands of merry thieves.

May God bless Pope Francis, and may the Holy Spirit guide him!

The "Conclave' and my personal Catholicism...

Here goes the latest rant.

As we speak, the Conclave in Rome is taking place, with a hundred something Cardinals taking two votes a day in the process of selecting a new Pope as leader of the Catholic Church, and as Vicar of Christ on Earth.

I was inspired to write this by a young friend who also has a blog and has expressed her feelings quite well about the bashing of the Church which is taking place in the mainstream media.  I have had enough of this.  If someone in the mainstream media dared to bash Muslims, there would be an outcry like none other.  While I know there are good and bad people in all religions, I am particularly tired of hearing all the 'pedophile' and 'child abuser' jokes and tasteless excuses for 'humor' especially on facebook.

I have stopped watching TV about it, and cannot bear to read comments or editorials about the Church, or the Conclave.  I'm tired of hearing people preach about 'oh they should let priests marry' or 'oh they should have women priests' or 'they should loosen their restrictions on whatever'.  Get over it, people, it's NOT happening.  The priests will not marry (and I don't want any arguments about it), and there will be no women priests, not now, not ever.   I am tending to take the media's criticisms very personally.  Here's my opinion like it or not.

The vast MINORITY of priests and clergy have ever done anything unethical or unlawful to any child or adult.  And I don't believe all the accusers are being truthful.  That doesn't mean for a second that I condone bad behavior by any priest.  But like all walks of life, a few bad apples make the bad name for the majority.  I'm just sick to death of this though.  I've had it.

My Catholic faith was instilled in me first by my parents and grandparents, and then by the good sisters of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, and further by the seven different orders of religious who taught me at West Catholic.  My faith is rooted in my heart and soul, and is very dear and VERY important to me. It is not dictated by the actions of any human.  It has gotten me through some stressful and sad times in my life.  It continues to sustain me to this day.  I believe that prayer is important, whether it be the formal prayers taught to me in my childhood, or plain language prayer, which takes awhile to master.  I believe in the power of prayer, and have seen that power in action.

Please don't get the idea that I'm a 'fanatic'.  I refuse to sit in judgment of anyone, and believe firmly that God is the Ultimate Judge of what a person does or does not do here in this short life.  And please don't get the idea I've always been so religious.  (I do prefer the word 'spiritual' vs. 'religious'.)  Though I was raised in Catholicism, I drifted away in my early working life, and didn't venture back until the early 1990s.  I was away from the Church for more than 25 years when I was inspired to return.  I thank my neighbor, Anita, and the Pastor Emeritus of my parish, the late Fr. Joseph Dougherty, for the initial 'kick' back into my Church.

I was scared to DEATH of going to Confession after that long, but Fr. Dougherty made it painless, easy, and wonderfully uplifting.  He was a wonderful homilist, and a great priest.  I miss him greatly.  I am glad he's not around to see what's going on now, in the parish, and in the world.  (Even though I'm convinced he's watching from above.)

So, anyway... I know I'm very free with my opinions, and they are usually, as the title of the blog says, Not Sugar Coated.  And I realize that others are entitled to their opinions of the faith and the Catholic Church, good, bad or indifferent.

But that won't stop me from saying I despise some of those opinions, which I feel are based on the actions of a very few men.  I also believe this is a bad reason (and a COP OUT)  for saying you 'don't believe' in God, the Church, or Christianity in general.  Grow up.  There are a few bad people in all walks of life.  Not all people are bad, not all priests are bad.  Get over it.

In closing... may God bless the Cardinals, and may the Holy Spirit guide them!