This is a slightly edited REPOST of a mini-rant previously published in 2015 about what Christmas Shopping in Center City meant to me at one time, and in response to a stupid article about "Things to Do in Philadelphia for Christmas".  Interesting.  Hope you have the same sweet memories of Center City that I do.  For there's NOTHING THERE now that makes that trip worth the risk or trouble. 


WARNING:  If easily offended, go read your cereal box or go make a fuss about a damn Starbuck's cup (again). You shouldn't be drinking that damned SWILL anyway.  Awful, bitter and overpriced....  So, if you're already offended, read no further here. 

First of all, please know that in spite of the tone of this post, I really love and am proud of my hometown for its historical significance, my family ties, and for the memories it has given me.  I am NOT proud of what it has done to center city's shopping district, not one little bit.  I'm not proud of its politics or its drunken, lame ass poor excuse for a "mayor".   All the problems the city has... and they worry about moving a statue.  IDIOCY!  Go ahead, keep electing the same IDIOTS though.  The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results.  But I digress.

A few people posted "Things to Do in Philadelphia for Christmas".  Well it suggests the "macy's" Light Show and the Comcast light show, the ice rinks at City Hall and the riverfront, the lights across the streets in South Philly, Peddler's Village and Longwood Gardens among a few other minor attractions.  We'll just pretend someone knew how to move Longwood Gardens and Peddler's Village into Philadelphia.  What the hell brand of yuppie induced insanity is this??  Are you all drinking this kool-aid???  Though I understand that there is now another "City Lights" thing with lights on City Hall.  Looked kind of cool on TV but no, I still wouldn't waste the time!  

When I was a kid, Christmas in Philly was REAL.  It was fascinating and magical.  There really WERE many things to see and experience.  I'm talking mid 60s - early 70s here.  You could get on the bus and go to town, take the subway, buses, or whatever and not worry about getting mugged or having to be armed.

I remember Mom taking me to center city in the early 60s to see the stores all decked out for Christmas, and it wasn't till AFTER Thanksgiving that they were decorated.  It would be a full day, and we thought it very exciting to take the "trolley that goes into the tunnel" to get there.  I remember Angela *my paternal grandmother* taking me to Wanamakers every year to buy new clothes to add to what she made for me herself.  She would wear her mink coat and we would take a taxi.  Some overbearing young bimbo there once asked her why she had the nerve to wear mink.  My grandmother told her "Lady, please go fuck yourself."  Yes, verbatim.  At least she said "please". 

For me it was walking to 65th and Elmwood, taking the 36 Trolley to 13th St. or from South Philly, take the 17 bus to 13th.  From there, I'd go into Wanamaker's, shop a little, see the REAL Light Show with the dancing water fountains synchronized with the music of Tchaikovsky's Nutcracker.  Then walk down the south side of Market, stop in Lerner's on 12th, down to Dial Shoes, Marianne Shop, the Hallmark store, go to the Post Office to get Christmas stamps, go into Gimbels, shop, then cross the street at 8th.  From there, into Lits, look in the bargain basement, then cross and go to my favorite.  The Queen of Department Stores in my heart will always be Strawbridge & Clothier.  There, I'd shop more, maybe have lunch, go to the York Shop, and if I hadn't eaten in Strawbridges, stop at Horn and Hardart.  I might or might not go to Hanscoms, go to more shoe stores, then head back up to the subway station with arms full of packages, and STILL not worry about getting mugged.  It was a full, happy day in an easy, happy time.  I'm sure I'm not the only one who can recall doing the very same thing.  How many of you can remember the complete layout of Strawbridges and still "see" it in your mind's eye?  I can picture every floor, and still tell you where everything was.

Fast forward to the 80s... well you could still do some of the above, but you have to be willing to walk through the pickpocket filled, crime ridden, awful "Gallery".  Filthy except for the first 6 or so months after it opened.  Strawbridges was its anchor, and was the only store worth anything except for when the JC Penney anchored the other end.  But still a far cry from decent if you ask me.  And it deteriorated very quickly.  And don't go near there during the holidays if you wanted to leave with everything with which you entered, for roving bands of little bastards were looking for idiots who don't watch the surroundings to let down the guard for even a second.  

In the 90s the Gallery was bad enough that some little criminal son of a bitch tried to steal my work cellphone right out of my pocket on the escalator between the bottom and street levels.  I felt his hand go into my pocket.  I was armed, but the escalator wouldn't have been a good place for a shooting.  So I not so politely told him if he didn't get the f**k away from me I would kick his f**king little white-trash thug animal ASS down the escalator.  I believe I also told him I'd kick his mother, too.   He complied and lived to steal another day.

Fast forward to today.  Well, who would get on the 36 Trolley now?  Well not me.  So however you get to town, there is no more Wanamakers.  There is a "macy's" which can't hold a candle to Wanamakers, or any other Macy's for that matter.  It's a piss poor excuse for a department store. 

There is no more Lerner's.  There is no more Marianne's.  There is no more Dial Shoes.  In fact, the whole block *once Snellenburg's, before my time* is gone. There is no more Gimbels.  There is no more Lits.  There is, sadly, no more Strawbridges, and now even the filthy disgusting Gallery is closed.  Of course there is no Horn and Hardart, and no more Hanscoms. 

Market East is dead, unless you want to go down to 6th to the Historic district, and down further to the yuppie part of town that boasts overpriced restaurants and no reasonably priced parking. 

Sorry but the memories are all that live on for me when you say "Center City Philadelphia". 

I wish all of you had the same memories of the 60s and 70s.  I'm sure some of you have even better memories of it from the 40s and 50s.  I wish I could have seen it then.  Take it from me, it was a wonderful, magical place.

So... rant over *for now*.