On Turning Sixty... and Surprises.

Today I was invited to a combined 60th birthday party... for my friends Donna and Stephanie.  I knew about the party months ago, but THOUGHT it was only for them....  Boy was I WRONG.

The party was for them all right but it was a Surprise Party for MY 60th birthday.

We had already been to a 50th Anniversary party for our cousins, Roseanne and Mill Affleck.  I was watching the clock because the birthday party was to start at 2 pm.

We went to Fishers and I knew we were a bit late. I walked in, and saw the first face belonged to Steve Quinn, my friend and former boss.  I'm thinking "what the hell is HE doing here"... then look at the table he's sitting at and see Roseanne Gleeson, a co worker.  I look to my left and by now everyone is yelling "SURPRISE" but it's not making sense to me.  I look again and see a table with Anne Jones, and next to her is Marc Rapson.  Now my mind is reeling, what are THEY doing here???  I see Bill Thrower snapping photos, and see Donna and Stephanie.  Now I know THEY'RE supposed to be there!!

It took a full minute for me to realize I'd been royally HAD.

I was truly speechless, and for those of you who know me, that's pretty rare.  I actually cried a little, also pretty rare for me.  I've never been a 'crier'.

Anyway, it was a blast of a party, my Mom, Lou, my brothers, sisters in law, nephews, brothers in law and sisters in law (who'd just left the last party, too).  Of course I thank my friends who are also family, Steve Quinn, Jerry and Kathy Reilley, Bill Thrower, my "brotherman".

Of course I'd like to specially thank Anne and Chuck Jones, and my dear Rapson boys, Marc, Ryan and Sean.  (who was supposedly going to check on Ziva!)...  And of course, my sneak-in-chief of a husband, Lou, and his co-conspirators, Donna and Leon Makowiecki, and of course Stephanie Hickman.

I cannot tell you how much it means to me to call you all my family and friends.  I love you all beyond measure.  You are all within my "defending circle" and will always be there.

Thanks again for being there for me, always.

In love,

Patty  xoxoxox

A New Rant: Why I HATE Air Travel, or, the Unfriendly Skies...

Well here goes another one...  Today I returned from a wonderful trip to Florida with my friend of forty (yes 40) years, Donna.  We had a great time together, talking, laughing, visiting with her cousins, seeing her cousin Nick graduate as class Valedictorian.    

The only thing we both dreaded... flying.  Let me be clear.  I am not afraid to fly, but rather after today, afraid that I'll commit murder either getting to the plane or getting off the plane.  It's the people who fly, who think they are the only people in the plane or on the face of the earth that make me livid. 

Donna and I have decided that if we ever have any say in how an airline should be run, and how to make things easier for all concerned, the following rules will apply, with no exceptions:  

1.  There will be a STRICT carry on bag policy.  You will be allowed ONE small bag.  It will need to fit under the seat in front of you.  That's because there will be NO overhead compartments in which to cram your 500 pounds of shit.

2.  There will be NO charge for checking your bags, so you won't be lugging them into the cabin.  However, if you dare to bring a bag that doesn't fit under the seat onto a plane, you will be charged $100.00 on the spot AND it will be checked anyway.  You will pay for inconveniencing everyone who obeyed the rules.  Don't want to pay?  You and your shit get kicked off the plane.  Too bad for you.

3.  You will NOT be able to lounge your seat into the personal space of the person behind you.  There isn't enough room on the damn plane as it is, and now this inconsiderate ass in front of you has to be a jerk.  The seats on our airline will NOT move.  You will just have to sit up straight for the flight.  Don't like it?  Wah. Yeah, there's always USeless Air or one of the other ripoffs.

I cannot stand the fact that the airlines do NOT abide by or enforce their own carry on bag rules.  People drag huge bags onto planes, hold up everyone else when they try to cram them into the overheads.  There's never enough room in them to allow for every inconsiderate buffoon to stuff his or her shit in there.  But they will stand there in the middle of the aisle, and try.  They will stand there, holding everyone up, and powerlift a huge suitcase, duffel bag, skateboards, strollers and every other kind of crap you can think of in those compartments.  And then insist on opening and slamming them 40 times.

When you go to get off the plane (and believe me, after any flight there is nothing you want more than to get OFF that effin' plane) of course the aforesaid inconsiderate buffoons have to wrestle their damn shit OUT of the compartment, yet again holding everyone up who abided by the carry on rule.  

I don't understand why, even if airlines charge for the bags, the convenience isn't worth the money - not to have to lug the shit to the gate, put it on the plane, wrestle it to the compartment, get it down, hold everyone up, drag it out, all the way through the terminal.  All just to avoid... paying  the money?  The baggage claim?  Sorry I just don't get it.  You can't afford it?  Well, you paid for the damn ticket and probably stood in some sorry ass line for a $7.00 Starbucks coffee because you had to be at the airport two hours early.  

And last but certainly not least... someday some airplane builder will realize that a 14 inch seat does not comfortably accomodate a 20 inch butt.  And two feet of space in front of you couldn't possible accomodate a 6'4" person with any degree of comfort.  So you cram yourself into this tiny space, then the effin' jerk in front of you has to put the seat all the way back.  This puts the back of his seat not even a foot from your face, making it impossible to put your tray down or comfortably read.  

In closing, I have found that at least half of the air travelers I have seen are stuck up, inconsiderate, self centered a-holes who think they are the only ones on the plane, and don't give a damn about anyone else's comfort or time.

So if you are an offender of any of the above, don't expect to fly on MY airline.  And stay out of my way.  

Rant over (for now).  

Memorial Day... Lest We Forget what it's REALLY all about.

This may be the one and only post you ever see from me that probably won't offend anyone!  Believe it or not.

Contrary to some beliefs, Memorial Day is not all about picnics and beer... but it IS about those brave souls who gave their ALL for freedom. Yes, the Freedom to be able to have picnics and beer. So many of our brave soldiers have given their lives so we could enjoy what so many of us sadly take for granted. 

It is immensely important that we take a moment sometime this weekend and say a prayer for all those who gave their all. And to pray for those who gave their lives and have no one to remember them, and those who rest in foreign soil in many far corners of the world. 

I personally know several veterans of various wars. My mom's friend, Lou LaGioia, is a veteran of Iwo Jima and was very physically close to the flag raising. He is a hero but insists that the heroes are those who died there. He was on the burial detail and was one who saw the torture inflicted on very young men. They were teenagers and men in their 20s... hero children themselves.  Imagine that for a minute - some of you have teenage kids.  Imagine YOUR 19 year old seeing burned, tortured and mutilated fellow servicemen who had been their buddies, comrades, friends.   

Another friend is a Vietnam veteran who took a very long time to even talk about his war experiences because he was so emotionally wounded. When he finally opened up there was no stopping him and I have listened to him for many, many hours. He won the Bronze Star and Purple Heart.  He is a hero, too but insists that the heroes are those who didn't make it back. 

Yet another, our (great great) nephew, Tony Polichetti, serves now as we speak, in a foreign land and far away from those he loves. I pray every day for his safe return to his loving family. Thankfully he will be home in not too long a time. And there is also another (great) nephew, Matthew Polichetti, who recently joined the Marines.  There is another friend and co-worker of mine in the Air Force who served a few tours in Iraq and Afghanistan.  

Bravery is a weird thing and has many interpretations... but there is no greater love a man has than to lay down his life, or be willing to lay down his life for his country and to protect the freedom which costs so much. Just for instance... 

As Gunny Hiway said in "Heartbreak Ridge" (one of my favorite movies),  "Jumping out of a perfectly good aircraft is not a natural act"...  and I think that people who do this are crazy bordering on insane. But that does NOT MEAN that I don't absolutely know that every man who was a paratrooper in WWII was a stone cold HERO. It only means I couldn't do it. 

But then again, most people didn't want to transport prisoners and sit behind a desk for Uncle Sam for 37 years. But I did it. Veterans, especially those who gave their ALL, public servants, whether paratroopers, US Marshals, local police, firefighters and first responders... take a minute this weekend while you celebrate, and say a little prayer. For them, for us. Thank God for giving us those who gave their all, and thank the soldiers and veterans you see today. It means more than you think.  I can't tell you how many times a young Marine has stopped the aforementioned Lou LaGioia, shook his hand and thanked him for his service.  It takes so little effort to make someone's day.

Shake their hands, give them a smile, say Thank You, and if you're in a restaurant and can do it, PICK UP THE CHECK. Get your sorry butts to Arlington National Cemetery and see the Changing of the Guard. Go to DC on a Tuesday night to the Iwo Jima Memorial and see the U.S. Marine Drum and Bugle Corps and the Silent Drill team. Its all good. 

Thanks for listening. Thanks, veterans. God bless you all. You ARE loved. 

Another Rant... Are you in THAT MUCH of a hurry?

As many of you know, I am a practicing Catholic.  Lou is, also.  This past Saturday, he went to the 4:00 PM Mass at St. John Bosco, our parish.  I went on Sunday morning to the Carmelite Monastery in Philadelphia.  Our rant is thus:  And here's the warning, if you're easily offended, STOP reading now.  If you read on, and it applies to you, and you're offended, GOOD.

Lou, as I stated, went to the Saturday Mass at 4 pm which is heavily attended at St. John Bosco.  I mean HEAVILY attended.  I will assume most people are going because of their obligation, or because they want to, or whatever.  Here's the point...

The good God gave us life, blessings.  We have enough to eat, a roof over our heads, and are clothed.  Most of us have good families and wonderful friends, and people we love, who love us in return.

What God has for us is LIMITLESS, unconditional and absolute love.  Think of how your dog loves you, but make that love boundless and eternal. You could leave the dog after scolding it, and then come back five minutes later, and guess what, that dog still loves you.  You can leave God after sinning, and then come back after thirty years (as we did) and guess what, that God still loves you.  Maybe that's why GOD spelled backward is DOG.

Think of how you feel if you see someone you love that you haven't seen in a long time.  You hug, kiss, smile, laugh, and are joyful and happy.  When we walk into God's house, I like to think He is happy to "see" us.  I like to think that if I make a visit to the Adoration Chapel, it's like a surprise visit to someone who really REALLY wants to see me.  It's my way of "befriending" God and keeping a close relationship with Him.

Here goes...  WHY must people go to Mass, go to Holy Communion, which is reception of God Himself, and head STRAIGHT for the door to get out as if someone were chasing them?  What, you can't stay for the last FIVE minutes to receive the blessing?  Are you in THAT much of a hurry to just get out of the parking lot?  If a missed friend came to see you and made you happy, and you give of yourself to them, why would you be happy to see them RUN full speed out of your house?

Well, I think for a person to go running out of the church with Communion still in their mouths is not only disrespectful to the Sacrament, but it is, in my opinion, downright sacrilege.  What, are you SO damn much in a hurry to beat traffic out of the church lot that five more minutes are going to really matter?  And to leave without the blessing?  Seriously, are you SO important that you can't give God five more minutes?  After all He has given you?  Really?  He gives unconditional love, and you can't give (not even) an hour?  Wow, you must really think you're important.

My childhood pastor at St. Barnabas Church, Father Joseph LaRue, would STOP on the altar and call you OUT.  "Hey Mister, WHERE do you think you're going?  SIT DOWN."  Sometimes I think it's a shame that the fire codes prohibit locking the doors.

Think about what you're doing the next time you think that five minutes is going to REALLY matter.  What are you rushing back to?  Work?  House full of noise?  House full of chaos?  Housework?  You can't WAIT to get back to that, huh?  You afraid you're going to miss Early Bird at Warminster West or the Red Lion?  Suck it up, cupcake.

By the way, at the Carmelite Monastery, NO ONE leaves till after the recessional hymn.

OK, rant over.  (for now).

Entitlements? I don't think so... Warning: This is all about ME. :)

As always I will start this rant by saying... if you get offended easily, STOP READING NOW.

I worked for the U.S. Marshals Service for 37 years.  I worked HARD.  There were not many days I wasn't busy from the morning till I left.  I loved my job (up until the last year and a half).  It identified who I was for a very long time.  I was extremely proud of my job, and did it exceedingly well.  I had enough of a reputation to be called upon, several times over several years, to set up administrative controls for fugitive operations, called into Headquarters to teach, called to Glynco to teach.  I was a formative member of a Fugitive Task Force that still exists even to this day, having started in 1983.  Did a lot of traveling to nice places, and lots more to NOT so nice places.

So enough about the job....   here goes.

Jump forward to today - someone posted one of those facebook posts of "wisdom" that said, and I quote:

"ENTITLEMENTS?  I paid cash for my Social Security insurance.  Our benefits are NOT some kind of charity or handout!  Congressional benefits... premium federal healthcare, outrageous retirement packages, 67 paid holidays, three weeks paid vacation, unlimited paid sick days!  Now THAT'S welfare.  And they have the nerve to call my retirement an entitlement??"   Repost  yada yada

Well, guess what.  I don't like that this post makes it sound like ALL federal employees get 'entitlement' instead of 'retirement'.  This pisses me off no end.  I worked for THIRTY SEVEN years for my retirement.  Nobody GAVE it to me, I EARNED it, every fu**ing dollar of it.  FOR YOU.  I was a PUBLIC SERVANT.  I worked FOR YOU.  And don't give me that "MY taxes paid YOUR salary" shit, either.  That was always good to piss me off too.  I AM A TAXPAYER TOO,  you simple ass.

I don't get Social Security, and I'm glad.  I paid for my retirement, it's NOT charity.  I PAY for my 'premium healthcare'.  NOBODY gives it to me.  I do NOT have an 'outrageous' retirement package.  I do ok for giving Uncle Sam 37 years of my life.  I did NOT get 67 paid holidays or 'unlimited paid sick days'.  I did get 26 days vacation a year, WHICH I EARNED.  So get it out of your mind now, if that's what you think about what a federal employee gets.  (by the way, they pay into Social Security now just like everybody else).

These congressional ASSHATS make all the money, get all the perks, get all the paid holidays, unlimited sick leave, free travel, armed protection, and they get painfully little done.  If I were half as inefficient at my job as these effin' LOSERS are, I would have lost my job way before 37 years.  And they would have done it, as hard as it is to fire a federal employee.

Now that I've retired (as of July 3, 2008)...  I reserve the right to get up when I want, do what I want WHEN I want (OR NOT).  I can go to church, the library, shopping.  If I wanted to I could get a part time job, or volunteer.  I give blood, have time to go to lunch with my mother, or go to movies with a friend.  I sit at my computer, and read and WRITE, which I love to do.  I always wanted the time to write, and now I have it.  I read papers, blogs, and look at Youtube and whatever else I find interesting.  I cruise eBay.  I like Etsy.  I browse Pinterest and Facebook.  Not a day goes by I don't learn something new.

There may be some (I'm sure there are) who think I'm lazy because I always smile when I say "NOTHING" when people ask what I do now. If I wanted a job, I'd have one.  I looked forward to the ability to do NOTHING for a very long time, so if you think I need to go out and get a job, or do something, or whatever, guess what.  You can eat shit and bark at the moon.  

If you can retire at 55 and do "nothing"... translation:  whatever you want... more power to you.  I did.  I'm very happy, and that's what matters. I guess if you want to call THAT an 'entitlement'...  go right ahead.  Just know I EARNED IT.

If you're offended, tough.  Build a bridge and GET OVER IT.

"Music" at Masses: Songs, not Hymns.

This post is purely my unbridled, uncensored opinion about the so-called 'music' at St. John Bosco church in Hatboro.  I am critical, opinionated and brutally honest. Translation:  If you are easily offended... stop reading NOW.

I am a church going Catholic.  I love my faith, even though I was away for awhile.  I was in the choir at St. John's when they had a REAL trained choir director, Mrs. Winifred Bell.  She was a gifted, wonderful, patient woman, and a good friend.  When she retired, we floundered awhile until we were lucky to snag Dr. Lucy Carroll, another gifted, trained conductor and a wonderful musician.  She taught us much about singing and music.  Then... the pastor at the time, who was a creep, fired her, and we walked.  We went to the Carmelite Monastery in Philadelphia to sing.

We remained at the Monastery for ten years, till a few years ago.  Their choir still does a wonderful job.  And I continue to love the music, the sacred, beautiful HYMNS and motets, polyphony, and chant.  I learned to completely despise the garbage they call music now at masses.  If that's what you like, oh well ok, but it's definitely not me, I don't think it is respectful or sacred.  I still go to the Monastery when I need to hear good, lovely and well executed hymns and music.

Back to St. John Bosco...  a couple of years ago they made their 7am Mass music-less.  Which, considering I can't stand the more 'modern' music, was a welcome thing to me.  I would much rather have silence than the awful din and unsingable excuses for music they pick, and 'sing'.  I have, many times, complained to the parish powers about their music choices.  They insist on throwing songs (not hymns) out there which sound like circus music and BAD 70s disco.  Now they removed their 'recommendations' section from their facebook page, but that certainly will NOT keep me from letting them know how I feel.   Now that it's Easter Season, we devotees of the 7am Mass must put up with their awful music.  Nothing worse than bad music done badly.

If their 'music director' is a trained conductor, I am a monkey's uncle.  She is at best, a lounge singer and at worse, a 'performer' when she should be leading the congregation, not performing.  Now let me say I know many singers, one in particular, who has a beautiful voice.  I have heard her sing everything from oldies to the National Anthem.  She does both well and appropriately.  If she were a cantor at a church, I'm pretty sure she wouldn't use the same singing style as she does in either of her other venues.  If she were meant to LEAD the congregation, I doubt she would make it all about HER.

But this 'music director' makes it all about her when she is supposed to be leading.  And she is over dramatic in her moves and vibrato.  She sings an octave higher than is comfortable for any alto (like myself) or any male voice.  Most times, NO ONE is singing with her because she's out of everyone's range.  Not to mention that the 'music' is so UNsacred and irreverent, und un-melodic.

I see no reason why, if you MUST have 'music' at the 7am Mass, you can't offer more traditional HYMNS as opposed to songs, and God forbid you should sing anything in the beautiful universal language of the Church, which is LATIN.  Not everything, just a hymn here and there.  Maybe to keep your older folks happy?  You think they want to hear the SCHLOCK you are belting out from the pulpit like some cheap lounge lizard?  I think not.  They probably would actually SING ALONG with some traditional hymns.

It's pretty bad when the chimes from the bell tower at St. John's plays better music than what is heard on the inside.  Really.

Get with it, Ms. "music director".  Give us a break.  Pick some traditional, sacred music, and preserve the respect and mystery that the Mass is supposed to be, and leave the Oregon Press schlock, tripe and crap alone for once.  You may be surprised to actually hear people joining in the singing, or even want to actually (gulp) join your choir.

And there you have it.  If you are grossly offended, too damn bad.  I warned you.

That 'equal' sign...

Mini rant for the day:  Before you read further, remember the name of this blog:  NOT SUGAR COATED.  If you are easily offended, STOP READING NOW.  Be warned.

I'm noticing that lots of people are making that red 'equal' sign their profile picture... in favor of equal rights for ... whoever.  Blah blah blahhhhhhhh.  Here's how I feel.

If you are gay... fine.  I really don't care.  If you are straight, I really don't care.
If you want to marry... fine.  I really don't care.  If you don't, I still don't care.
If you want to marry your pet goat... fine.  I really don't care.  If you don't, I really don't care.
If you want to be happy with whoever... fine.  I really don't care.  If you want to be miserable, I don't care.
If you like broccoli... fine, eat it till you drop.  I really don't care.  If you don't... I don't care.
If you think marriage should be between a MAN and a WOMAN, fine.  I really don't care.  If you think otherwise, that's your right, too.  And I will not judge you, it's not my job.

If you think I'm going to change my profile picture to an equal sign, I'm not, and that doesn't necessarily mean I agree or disagree with what it stands for.  It's because I think it's not an attractive picture.  You have a right to your equal sign and I have a right to a picture of my brothers and myself.

If you want to interpret the Bible and say gays are going to hell, you're perfectly free to do that, but YOU aren't the ultimate Judge.  That's not our job.   It's not our job to say ANYONE goes to hell, including Hitler.  Who are YOU to say where he is???

If I used birth control and you think I'm going to hell, well, you don't know me, and still don't have the right to judge me any more than I have a right to judge you.

I don't believe that politicians should be involved if you want to marry your girlfriend, boyfriend, or your pet goat.  They should have a whole lot of more important shit to worry about.

If you are kissing in public and are straight... I don't want to see it.  YUCK.
If you are kissing in public and you're gay.....I don't want to see it.  YUCK.
If you treat me badly and you're straight, I will not respect you.  If you treat me badly and you're gay, I will not respect you.
If you mistreat or hurt someone I love and you're straight, you might as well be dead.  If you mistreat or hurt someone I love and you're gay, you might as well be dead.

Noticing a trend here?  You're already all equal in my book.

If you love this blog... fine.  I really don't care.  If you hate it, I still don't care.  Find a cereal box or something.